Seeing Him Made My Heart Warm & Tingly

A parent is not a parent just by simply sharing the same genes as the child's.
Just like how a friend is not a friend just by hanging out together all the time.
I've went through partial child neglect.
I've been deprived from my brother's love and support.
I need a brother's love.
Because of that, I started having feelings for my brother.
I think I have a sister-brother complex.
In my head I made a world where I had many brothers.
Each brother would give me the love and support I needed.
And I would be proud of them, just like a little kid.
This is a really weird phase I'm going through.
I've never imagined experiencing all these feelings.
However, suddenly one day I met this amazing person.
And all of a sudden I realized my face was turning red, and my heart was beating so fast.
I realized I've grown deep and passionate feelings for that person.
However, these feelings are one-sided.
I became a stalker for that person.
I was stalking because I was searching for the 'thing' my heart needed the most.
Just seeing him made my heart all warm and tingly.
I get this sweet buttery feeling leaving the vessels of my heart and running throughout my body.
I smile like a stupid person when I'm alone and beside others.
I've replaced my brother with this person.
I hope one day that person will be aware of my presence and feelings.
I'm really grateful for his existence.